Tuesday, March 30, 2010

It spoke to me

"She was no longer wrestling with the grief, but could sit down with it as a lasting companion and make it a sharer in her thoughts."

I am no longer at constant battle with my sadness. That war will never be over, but I have come to terms with the fact it will always be there. Sometimes it is a comfort to know it is there. Is that weird?

PS DO NOT POST SPAM COMMENTS ON POSTS ABOUT MY BABY

March 30, 2006

This time four years ago I was sitting in an L&D bed waiting for them to insert the lamineria. I met the nurse that would forever impact the way I felt about nurses.

Her name is Kathy Kennedy. She was a gift from God. She was so wonderful and made a horrible situation tolerable.

The doctors kept saying it would only take a few hours. I don't think anyone was prepared for days.

Saturday, March 27, 2010

March 27 2006

The phrase "incompatible with life" entered my lexicon. Today we found how bad it really was. Today were heard things like "surprised you carried this long." "A wonder this pregnancy wasn't miscarried."

Today I learned I would never have a truly "innocent" pregnancy ever again.

Thursday, March 25, 2010

March 25, 2006

4 years ago today we found out there was a problem. We had no idea how bad it was.